One of the things I like least about working and using daycare is the drop off. Some days it is no big deal. I'll get there, get him settled in playing with something, and off I go. I usually sneak out while he's distracted because a long, drawn out good-bye doesn't work for either of us, but on the good days, he doesn't even notice that I'm leaving. Other days, it's full of drama. He's clinging to me, saying "mama, mama" over and over, and crying. One of his teachers will have to pull him from my arms so that I can go. It's literally heart wrenching to hear that and know he just wants you and isn't ready to be left yet.
He definitely doesn't do act that way the rest of the day. Usually if I stand outside the door for two minutes, he's adjusted and off playing with the other kids. It's just that initial moment of feeling deserted or left that really gets him. It also may just be complete drama and him wanting me to know I'm making a bad decision. I guess I don't really know. All I know is that it makes me feel guilty every time!
When B drops off, he says (and our head teacher agrees) that Spence does fine. Very rarely will he be upset. Most times, he goes in, starts playing and is over it. I know that he loves daycare- he is always smiling and playing when we pick him up. Both teachers report how good and easy he is and that he really does well with the other kids. From what I see at certain points of the day, he loves the other kids and interacts with them really well. So, he's very well adjusted there and is learning a ton. It's just the drop off that is hard. I suppose I should be thankful that it's not a constant, daily, ongoing problem where he cries all day and isn't adjusted at all. That's a complete blessing. I just wish that leaving him weren't so hard. It's definitely harder on me, and I know that, but it doesn't always make it easier!!
Losing Hope and Feeling Scared
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