Well, it wasn't anything like I was hoping. They checked me for the first time today (this office waits until 39 weeks unless you've been contracting), and I was not dilated at all, and Pud's head is still not engaged. Plus I'm still having no "real" contractions. Soooooo.....good news is that B's race won't be interrupted by the birth of the baby (only yucky b/c it's going to be 44 degrees and raining- boo!). Bad news is that there is little chance of us having a baby this weekend :(
We have another apt on Monday with a non-stress test, an ultrasound to check for fluid levels, and a full apt. We have to start talking about induction at that point, apparently. She asked me if I wanted to talk about it today, but I just couldn't. I would like to see how Monday goes before I make any decisions about that.
Also, the midwife said today that she does NOT want me going back to work. At all. As of today at 5 p.m. Ummmmmmm......yea, that didn't fly so well. I do not want to spend my days at home waiting for Pud. I want to spend them WITH Pud. We're going to discuss this again during the apt on Monday- maybe I'll go in for half days or have a lightened load or something. I just don't want to take up my very limited precious maternity leave without a baby, you know? And especially since I'm not on bedrest or having any problems- seriously, ladies, I'm as healthy as a horse (love these genes!)! She seems to think that if I rest, relax, stay calm (all three slightly hard for this go go go lady) then my body will know that I am ready and tell the baby to come. I'm just slightly stressed about this, but, as I told B today (who is completely agreeing with the midwife, btw), we'll see what happens Monday, open up all the options and go from there. I did promise I would really, really rest this weekend, and I plan to stick to that.
I've been so blessed with such a good pregnancy that it's hard to know that a possible induction and/or c-section could be in my future. Not really in my original plan, huh? But, God knew I was terrified of a pre-term baby and he's just answering a big prayer, I suppose. I'll get through this, I just know I will. Probably with a breakdown or two this weekend, but hopefully with a super healthy, chunky, happy baby in the end (even if that is not by natural methods).
And, really, isn't that all one can hope for???
#89: A Year Without Shopping
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